MY CALCULATOR TELLS PORKIES 

A tad harsh maybe, but these mathematical gadgets are not infallible.

Trust me, the humble pocket calculator will produce incorrect answers if it is not hardwired with the correct order of operations. This becomes a problem which can be frustrating, even demoralising when used by younger students who already find mathematics daunting. It must be said, however, these delinquent calculators belong to the cheaper variety of the species.

Let me explain. If one such device is within reach enter the sum ‘20 – 4 x 2’ followed by the equal key. Should the display read 32 the calculator has given the WRONG result. The answer is twelve—yes twelve!

Twelve . . . twelve . . . twelve.  Reminds me of Geoff, from Year 7 back in the seventies, who had the coolest pronunciation for “twelve”.

“Twerrve’ he would say, “Twerrrrve.”  Give it a go. Say the word out loud yourself—slow and smooth. A silky sound reminiscent of Nat King Cole. 

“I’ve counted twerrve Mr Rees”

“Sir, what about twerrve?” 

“The time? The time is twerrve o’clock.”

Now please don’t accuse me of being politically incorrect or downright insensitive. This student had no speech impediment, merely a neat way of saying “twelve”. Every other word he used sounded normal—but not “twerrrve”. I confess at times I wrote a question on the board with the answer 12, just to elicit Geoff’s response.

“Yes, Geoff?”

“Twerrrrrrve Sir.”

Aah—just to savour the sweet sound of his mellifluous melodic phrasing.

But forgive me for waxing lyrical. Why is the answer to the above sum 12? 

In mathematics, we adhere to a set of conventions which dictate the order to perform operations. In our sum, the multiplication must be calculated before the subtraction. This gives 20-8 and a final solution of 12.

Note to self: Should you need to purchase a calculator for school first key in ‘10 – 4 x 2 =’. If the outcome is twerrrrrve, consider purchasing another model.

“I’ve dealt with numbers all my life, and after a while, you begin to feel that each number has a personality of its own.  Twelve is upright, conscientious, intelligent … whereas thirteen is a loner, a shady character …” Paul Auster (1947-) American Author.