Muddled by Mirror Images

“There was a little girl who had a little curl, Right in the middle of her forehead.”

Not in my classroom. No, not one girl—two! Twins, and both with a ringlet twisting its way down their brow. I spent my childhood not knowing the difference between the Flower Pot Men and now I was teaching teenagers that once again I could never tell apart—never, not ever, no never.

I confess identical items have always proved a dilemma. For example, consider the dashboard of my first wheels, a ’68 VW ‘beetle’. As well as the speedo’, the Spartan instrument panel boasted two matching knobs. Many times I turned on the lights to clear the windscreen or used the wipers when headlights were needed.

Besides, I don’t recall any ‘Gemini’ characters in my childhood. Maybe for that reason, look-a-likes posed a predicament.

But back to my twin girls. These congruent kids were an arty couple of pupils who always sat at adjacent tables. Comparable from coiffure to their little black court shoes. Duplicate hairstyles with corkscrew curls hanging face-side like Christmas decorations dangling from the mantle-piece. I’ll warrant at the self-same instant, each girl swept that curl behind their right ear.

This is no exaggeration. Folders, pencil cases, writing gear, calculators—every damn thing matched. Oops, apologies. But do I sound exasperated? Well, Yes-siree-bob. Frustrated every day because I perceived no distinguishing clues.

They often arrived in accessorised uniforms and yes—you guessed it. Gloves, scarves and hair thingies an impeccable match.

From my perspective as a teacher, their classroom qualities also displayed an uncanny resemblance. Both were courteous kids with a respectable work ethic. Mathematics wise though, both were towards the bottom rung of the classroom ladder. Kindred spirits, who often struggled to rack up double figures in assessment tasks.

For two years I persevered with report time, midyear and year’s end, proving a difficult exercise. Devising interchangeable, professional comments—addressing the same issues—became a formidable task.

Yep, always unsure,

Which girl was who;

When report time came,

What else could I do?

There are two things in life for which we are never truly prepared: twins.  Henry Wheeler Shaw aka Josh Billings (1818–1885) Humourist, Lecturer

The Flower Pot Men is a British children’s programme, produced by BBC television, first transmitted in 1952, and repeated regularly for more than twenty years.

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