binary

“Hey there young lady; give me your ear.
This isn’t my room, what am I doing here?”

At the sound of the voice, Zelda glanced around her bedroom. Angel, Balloo, Caramel and Dandelion peeped at her from their usual possies. Not one of their furry faces flinched. She suspected the words came from Spongebob on the television in the next room. She heard the yellow, rectangular prism sigh. “Aw, cheer up Squid”, he said. “It could be worse.”

“Now look here Zelda, I belong in the study,
I shouldn’t be here; I’m your Dad’s best buddy.”

Jumping from her stool, Zelda stomped to the door. “Muuuum? Daaaaad?” No answer. Puzzled, she closed the door and yanked her books from the schoolbag. Her mathematics homework glared at her from the desk. She had decided to pinch her Dad’s calculator instead of doing the sums herself.

“I’m the new millennium abacus, Binary is my name,
Use me to cheat if you wish, but you must take the blame.”

The CE button flashed in time with the words. Zelda rubbed her eyes and stared in disbelief at the nine-by-six-centimetre calculator. “I’m dreaming, calculators can’t talk,” she said.
“That one did,” said Balloo.
She turned her head. Must be a dream, thought Zelda. Or maybe I’ve stumbled upon a cheeky calculator and a bunch of busy-body bears.
“OK, OK: Who’s the mischievous mammal?” No answer: although Zelda noticed her softies had raised their eyebrows. Determined to start her homework she opened to Page 136: Exercise 8B: part a). The question read: calculate 2+5×3. Zelda picked up Binary.

“Let’s try the first question; give me the sum,
Punch in the numerals; I get twenty-one.”

Zelda looked at twenty-one on the display.
“Whoa, wait on. Are you sure twenty-one is the answer?” This time Dandelion spoke.
Zelda glared at her furry friends. “Of course that’s the result. Two plus five equals seven; multiply by three gives twenty-one. Calculators always give the correct answers, right?”
“No, they don’t.” Angel joined the conversation.
“But they must give the right answer. What’s the use of a calculator that gives a wrong result?”
“It’s just … well … how can I say this? … Some cheap calculators tell porkies,” said Angel.

Hold on a moment, who said I’m cut-rate,
I’m one handsome gadget, no need to slate.

“Aaarrrgggh, I’m confused. I have a talking calculator giving me one answer and a pack of brainy bears telling me otherwise. So, soft toys A to D, what do you reckon is the correct result?”
The teddies looked at each other. Caramel began; “Zelda, didn’t your teacher tell you if a sum has no grouping symbols you must do multiplication and division before addition and subtraction.”
“Well, yes I do. We wrote down a rule like that in our mathematics book. So, if the sum is 2+5×3, first I multiply five by three which equals fifteen. Then I go back to the start of the sum; two plus the fifteen gives seventeen. Not twenty-one but seventeen; Binary, you gave me a dud solution.”

“It’s not my fault so please don’t get gruff
I’m just not hard-wired to do that stuff.”

“OK OK. Back to Dad’s study you go, Binary. I’m on my own now. There’s only one thing worse than cheating – cheating and getting the wrong answers. By the way Binary, why do you always speak in verse?”

“I always rap with words that rhyme,
‘Cause my keypad goes from one to nine.”

 

 

Postscript

This short story was my submission to an assignment in the Creative Writing course I completed through the Writers Bureau. https://www.writersbureau.com/writing/other-courses.htm. The assignment was to write a short story for a publication of my choice. I suggested “Binary-Nil: Bears-One” (word count 583) — based on the idea, “My Calculator Tells Porkies” — could be sent to Spider Magazine, a United States Publication which accepts unsolicited submissions for their magazine for children ages 6-9. I did send my story to Spider Magazine but received no reply.